Is It Worth It?

One of the hardest things about life is that clarity rarely comes when you need it most.

When you're in the middle of a challenge, things aren't clear. They're messy. Uncomfortable. Uncertain.

You don't know how it's going to turn out.

You don't know what you're supposed to learn from it.

You don't know if all the struggle is even worth it.

Lately, I've been looking back three or four years.

Back to moments when I felt lost.

Moments when I questioned myself.

Moments when I wondered if I would ever get through what was in front of me.

At the time, I couldn't see the purpose in any of it.

I just wanted relief.

I wanted answers.

I wanted certainty.

Looking back now, I can see something I couldn't see then.

I made it through.

Not perfectly.

Not without scars.

But I made it through.

And because of that, I can honestly say that none of it was wasted.

It reminds me of a scene from Men in Black.

Tommy Lee Jones is walking away and Will Smith asks him a simple question:

"Is it worth it?"

Without hesitation, Tommy Lee Jones turns and says:

"Oh yeah. Yeah, it's worth it."

I've thought about that scene a lot over the years.

Because that's an easy answer when you're standing at the end of the story.

It's a much harder answer when you're standing in the middle of it.

When life is kicking your ass.

When your heart is broken.

When you're grieving.

When you're staring at a problem with no clear solution.

Ask yourself then if it's worth it and the answer might be very different.

"No."

"This sucks."

"I don't see the point."

And maybe that's okay.

Maybe we're not supposed to understand everything while we're living through it.

The older I get, the more I realize that many of the chapters I never would have chosen for myself became some of the most important chapters of my life.

Loss.

Heartbreak.

Disappointment.

Failure.

Confusion.

Not because I enjoyed those experiences.

Not because I wanted them.

But because they shaped me in ways comfort never could.

I can look back now and say it was worth it.

But that's my conclusion, not theirs.

Each of us has to walk our own path before we can answer that question for ourselves.

That's probably why I worry a little less these days when life doesn't make sense.

Not because I have the answers.

But because I have evidence.

Evidence that I've been through difficult seasons before.

Evidence that what felt permanent usually wasn't.

Evidence that life has a way of revealing things in its own time.

The truth is, some questions can't be answered while you're living them.

Sometimes the answer shows up years later.

You look back at a chapter you once wished away and realize it became part of the reason you're who you are today.

And from that vantage point, the answer finally becomes clear.

Yeah.

It was worth it.